Brightside Entry 14: A Different Ash Wednesday

Alright. I realize that writing this post will necessitate that I say a few things about my views on religion. And well, yeah before beginning this, I want to say that I respect people's different views on religion--whether anti or pro, what I'm about to say is just what seems to work best for me.

While I am a Catholic by birth, I don't believe in a lot of their practices like going to church and fasting and abstinence. Spirituality is an individual thing for me; I think it has more to do with reflection on your life and actions and being honest in your relations with others and with yourself. Also, I realize I don't like talking about it much, because it seems to do more harm than good--all the times I've talked about religion with religious people it has ended in an argument.

My mom, however, is a devout Catholic and so throughout our lives, we have been subjected to going to church and attending lots of religious functions; she is part of a religious movement as well as being a patron of the church.

After work, my brothers and I were contemplating whether or not to go to mass for Ash Wednesday and while we felt a certain guilt for not going--because it would necessitate we lie to our mom, I think what was even more unbearable was the thought of going because of that guilt. It felt dishonest and as we drove past the church in our green Chery car with windows that are tinted black, a general feeling of relief seemed to spread throughout the car.

So instead, we decided to commemorate Ash Wednesday at Mc Donald's, eating take out in our car and laughing about things like handicapped parking ["What if my penis is handicapped?" (Puangco, M. 2012)] and asking for a double cheeseburger wrapped in Fillet-o-Fish wrapper so that nobody knows you ate meat.

The meal (bought with coupons at that) was a very nice one. It felt like one of the most genuine meals I've ever had with family, and on a religious holiday at that. I think we all find a way to save ourselves and each other.